Learning Grit Is Not Difficult At All! You Just Need A Great Teacher!

Grit is our stubborn refusal to quit, regardless of adversity.

I had an opportunity to spend a day with so many incredible women at the Women's Leadership Symposium a few weeks ago. "Let's Get Gritty," was the title of Yvette McGee Brown's keynote address, and I walked away inspired to be fueled with grit. In my notes, I wrote in all caps, "DEFEAT AND SETBACKS ARE ALL PART OF THE GAME - PUT ON YOUR GAME FACE (Yvette McGee Brown, 2018)!!"

When I returned home that evening, I pulled Angela Duckworth's Grit Scale to see where I ranked in my own personal grit. I scored a 4.70 of a 5.0 scale. According to research, I scored higher than 95% of American adults. I ordered Angela's book immediately, I had a curiosity about the 0.30 difference on the scale. The reality of my Grit Score is that a Grit Score can change depending on your experiences at the time you are responding. The 0.30 difference on my Grit Scale is specifically Q2. Setbacks don't discourage me. I don't give up easily, which I answered "Not much like me."

In most cases, I face my hurdles head on. I hold myself accountable for my focus when I am faced with adversity. Distractions and discouragement happen when my self-confidence is wounded. I quickly fall victim to perfection syndrome and second guess myself, I become critical of my words and actions, and then my anxiety sets in. I am more vulnerable in these moments than I am stubborn, and I often feel an urge to give up.

Following the symposium, I felt an overwhelming sense of empowerment. I have become more aware of energy that is not meant for me. As a result, I have begun equipping myself to be more resilient in the moments where I may not be at at my best. Angela Duckworth writes, "To be gritty is to keep putting one foot in front of the other. To be gritty is to hold fast to an interesting and purposeful goal. To be gritty is to invest, day after week after year, in challenging practice. To be gritty is to fall down seven times, and rise eight."

There are 4 areas of my journey that helped me to refocus. Let's get gritty!

Growth: As a runner, I have been conditioning myself from a young age. It is important to prepare your mind and body for a race. I apply the same techniques as I grow toward grit. I listen to feedback and I adapt. Hurdles are scary, both mental and literal. You are going to stumble, they are going to smack you on the way back up, and you are going to have bumps and bruises. Stop, breathe, listen to feedback, and adjust. Rise and learn from failure.

Resiliency: I believe that our critics are armed with bow and arrows. They pull you back, but somehow forget they are launching you forward. Grit requires armor. Be immune to the criticism and negative energy that lead to disengagement or the desire to give up. Let the arrows fall to your feet. Take your next step forward.

Internal Strength: Fake it until you become it. Begin your day with meditation or quiet time to set your intentions or goals. Create a mantra or affirmation that comes to mind if moments of adversity arise. Wear a rubber band and snap yourself when you feel yourself reverting to old mindsets. Or pick a song that motivates you to put your game face on.

Tenacity: Be passionate about your goals. When we fall in love with our goals, we do whatever it takes to see it through. Distractions appear when we fall out of love with our goals. Wake up each morning and establish a plan that moves you closer to that goal. I love this card that was shared on Instagram by one of my favorite life coaches.

I have also learned to be more selective of those in my tribe. They celebrate my grit. They are radically candid with me. They recognize when I am focused in on my resilience, and they are uplifting. I do not settle. I have learned to not leave my destiny for others to manage; I alone have grunted, cried, and cursed my way up my mountains. The practice of grit is both continuous and rewarding.

Duckworth, Angela. (2016). Grit. The Power of Passion and Perseverance. New York: Scribner.